Lots of adults support Harry

Harry talks about some of the different adults in his life and how he has been impacted by those relationships.

Parents,
carers,
social workers,
teachers,
support staff,
health professionals,
legal advocates…

Care experienced children and young people often have a lot of adults in their lives.

Every child’s circumstances are different, but The Promise makes it clear that we must think about how we can better support relationships between children and the adults who support them.

People are always coming and going

“I’ve had a lot of social workers, I’m starting to think I’m the problem.”

Harry has been supported by social workers since he was little. For various reasons, his social workers have changed, and he’s had a lot of them. He’s not heard from his current social worker in a while which is usually a sign that he is going to get a new one soon – sometimes he gets notice that they are leaving, sometimes he doesn’t.

“I don’t trust social workers now because I know they’ll leave.”

There are many reasons why professionals move on from roles, and in many ways this is unavoidable. However, we must consider how we can manage these changes to best support the children and young people who may be impacted.

❔ Reflective questions

How can the other adults in Harry’s life support him if his social worker changes again?
What could help a new social worker build trust with Harry?

Does Harry have to attend the meeting?

“I don’t want to talk about my adoption right now.”

Harry has been told that he must attend an upcoming child’s planning meeting at school, but he doesn’t want to go. His headteacher knows Harry has the right to share his views – it’s the law – and she says that Harry will find the meeting “empowering”. Harry doesn’t agree with her. He doesn’t want to have to talk about his adoption, and he’d rather his Mum just went for him instead.

Harry’s headteacher is correct that children must be given the opportunity to share their views, but the law doesn’t say that they must attend meetings. There are lots of ways to gather information about how a child is feeling about school, and it’s important to listen to the child and engage with them in ways that work for them.

❔ Reflective questions

How might attending the meeting impact on Harry’s relationship with his headteacher?
How else could the school help Harry to share his views?

Important relationships with other school staff

“I trust them because they’ve helped me with problems.”

Harry spends a lot of time in the support base at school – it’s where he hangs out with his pals at lunchtime, and where he goes during some lessons for extra support. He really likes the staff in the base because he knows he can trust them. He says, “You can talk to them about anything.”

Schools are full of people, which means there are lots of opportunities to build relationships. Creating space and time so that children can create trusting, loving relationships with staff helps them to feel included at school. Recognising the value of those relationships to a child – regardless of the adult’s professional role – is one of the key takeaways of The Promise.

❔ Reflective questions

Who was your favourite adult at school and why?
How could Harry’s school take account of his most important relationships when planning his support?

Want to find out more?

🔗 Read our Navigate tips on Supporting school attendance

▶️ Watch our Navigate video about Building trust

Care Experience